It certainly HAS been a while! Haha! I bet i'm the only one who remembers this! I think I definantly got the most carried away with it. That's why I've decided I want to bring it back! So, now I'll fill you in...
I've already practically finished my Junior year of high school. Since my last post (see: 2009), I have experienced salvation, loss, and utter failure... Let me explain:
Salvation:
I became a Christian. I went to CIY church camp at Canyon Ridge and got baptized. I believe Jesus is the Truth, the Way, and the Life. I still have difficulties in my walk with Him, but I am trying.
Loss:
I have lost my best friends... well, most of my friends in many forms this year. I lost many "pals" because I realized how friggin' annoying and self centered they were. They never truly cared for me and when I needed them most, they were no where to be found. Of course, I decided they were out of my life... for good. Also, I lost my best friend and the love of my life. He passed away. Long story that you don't need to know right now. I found him, only to lose him a few months later. That killed me inside. It still does.
Utter Failure:
I was removed from the magnet program for failing. I was failing a few core classes. I was doing great in Aviation! I love that class. But of course Ms. Nickels sucks so... I'm out.
Now:
I'm planing to go to LVHS with my new best friend, Megan. I've discovered people who are real. They care about me and I love them so much! I'm getting my life on track, no thanks to anyone else, really! Aviation college anyone?! You know it! So, this will be my story! :D
5/14/10
2/25/09
On recent events...
Today was way stressful!! I got threw it though without going through I depressed phase!!! Lol. Anyways, it seemed like everything that could go wrong, did. I did let it get to me though. ^-^ Oh, okay, maybe I did get a little frustrated and yell a bit but not THAT much. Haha, anyways, I'm proud of myself!! So, one of my friends has been talking to me about some personal issues and I wanted to help, but didn't know how. I decided to talk to my mum and we had a long convo. Apparently she knows quite a bit about the subject... I never knew that. Now I know where I get it from. Lol. Most of you won't understand that. Anywhozzles... (haha love ya Shane!) Mr. LaCombe wants more pics so here are some random ones...
2/24/09
On religion...
I know it is extremely controversial, but I am pretty confused right now so I thought I'd share my views. Please don't be disrespectful if you comment.
I think the existence of God is possible; however, I think He is a lot different then how people see Him. I think He has no problem with same sex relationships because why would He make people that way if He wasn't? God loves all creatures no matter what.
I have always found it hard to believe in God because of something my father once told me. Have you ever been afraid of the dark when you are alone, but fine when someone is with you? That's what he sees God as; the thing people make up to feel safe in the "dark".
Recently one night, I was lying in my dark room crying because I suffer from long term depression. I asked out into the darkness for someone to help me. To save me from my pain. I was determined to ignore everyone the next day and just be miserable. I went to bed and when I woke up I was scared. I'm not sure why but I texted my friend right away. Needless to say, I wasn't emo that day.
Now some would immediately assume this was an act of God, but not me. I take a slightly more... analytical approach. I prefer to look at a topic from multiple points of view before I form an opinion on it. That's why I think that another possibility is that it is in fact the human mind. My bad mood and fear of becoming depressed would obviously give me a nightmare. I scarcely remember my dreams. That would cause me to wake up frightened.
As Mr. Valletti has said many times, reality is based upon how a person perceives things. I suppose I have the ability to alter reality in the sense that I can see things in different aspects.
I think the existence of God is possible; however, I think He is a lot different then how people see Him. I think He has no problem with same sex relationships because why would He make people that way if He wasn't? God loves all creatures no matter what.
I have always found it hard to believe in God because of something my father once told me. Have you ever been afraid of the dark when you are alone, but fine when someone is with you? That's what he sees God as; the thing people make up to feel safe in the "dark".
Recently one night, I was lying in my dark room crying because I suffer from long term depression. I asked out into the darkness for someone to help me. To save me from my pain. I was determined to ignore everyone the next day and just be miserable. I went to bed and when I woke up I was scared. I'm not sure why but I texted my friend right away. Needless to say, I wasn't emo that day.
Now some would immediately assume this was an act of God, but not me. I take a slightly more... analytical approach. I prefer to look at a topic from multiple points of view before I form an opinion on it. That's why I think that another possibility is that it is in fact the human mind. My bad mood and fear of becoming depressed would obviously give me a nightmare. I scarcely remember my dreams. That would cause me to wake up frightened.
As Mr. Valletti has said many times, reality is based upon how a person perceives things. I suppose I have the ability to alter reality in the sense that I can see things in different aspects.
Freewrite #2
On my purpose...
I'm just another body, getting in your way. I'm just another annoyance, ruining your day. The only reason I'm still here, is to wait for my last night. The one that may never come. I'll tell you I'm done waiting for someone to save me, but it's a lie. I still hope and pray that one person will be my salvation. A guardian angel; that's what I need. Someone to make me laugh and smile. Who can understand and help. A person who will help me do the right thing and catch me when I slip up. Someone who may even show me something I've never believed in before. Is it him? Is it her? Have I met them before? Do I see them everyday? Are they moving away? Will I meet them in a day, a month, a year? Or are they really even here?
I'm just another body, getting in your way. I'm just another annoyance, ruining your day. The only reason I'm still here, is to wait for my last night. The one that may never come. I'll tell you I'm done waiting for someone to save me, but it's a lie. I still hope and pray that one person will be my salvation. A guardian angel; that's what I need. Someone to make me laugh and smile. Who can understand and help. A person who will help me do the right thing and catch me when I slip up. Someone who may even show me something I've never believed in before. Is it him? Is it her? Have I met them before? Do I see them everyday? Are they moving away? Will I meet them in a day, a month, a year? Or are they really even here?
Freewrite #1
It's a little late so it doesn't make sense for this date lol. I wrote it February 19th.
Zomg! Cookies!
Iz mah birthday! So now you say "Happy Birthday" and I smile and say "Thanks!" Um, so far today is rockin'! I got Skittles, a teddy bear, and a really funny card. I also had a few friends who were mad at me because I didn't tell them it was my birthday. Lol. I don't tell anyone until the day of because I hate getting presents. I also got an Ipod. I was attacked by two posters today!!! I was like WTH?!? Lmao.
Zomg! Cookies!
Iz mah birthday! So now you say "Happy Birthday" and I smile and say "Thanks!" Um, so far today is rockin'! I got Skittles, a teddy bear, and a really funny card. I also had a few friends who were mad at me because I didn't tell them it was my birthday. Lol. I don't tell anyone until the day of because I hate getting presents. I also got an Ipod. I was attacked by two posters today!!! I was like WTH?!? Lmao.
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